Please

Posted on: 10/05/2007 12:30

As some of you know I have a problem with being miss understood and miss read. It is something that has burdened me my whole life. People think that I am mad when I am not, think I am trying to pick a fight with them when usually I am just trying to understand them or agree with them. I try very hard to show as much compassion and consideration to everyone, yet it is usually taken as the opposite. I am constently being acused of glaring at people when I have just a relaxed face. I am accused of being disrespectful when I am trying to ask questions for better clarification. I am accused of being snotty or sarcastic when I am either just being normal or serious. Even my own family and some of my friends don't know how to read me. I have already lost the most important person in my life because she claims that I am a negative person. People refuse to get to close to me because of who they think that I am. The more I try to change the perceptions once they have been voiced, the more adiment they keep to their assumptions.

I give up.
Anyone that reads this, I ask if you could think of me in your prayers.

Also, God, please help me to express that I think and feel globally and not personally. I don't want to potentially hurt anyone anymore because they think personally and not nesecarily globally all the time.

I wish that my outside matched my inside sooooo badly.
I am tired of how horrible it feels to to know that I have hurt someone.

realmseer's blog
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Comments

Wolfie

Posted on: 10/05/2007 17:03

*Peace Be With You Realmseer*

You are always in my PRAYERS

*Embrace of Fellowship*

Wolfie

abpenny

Posted on: 10/05/2007 20:02

Realms..it is heartbreaking to hear you sound so lost. Many people have difficulty in communicating, so I hope you don't feel alone in this area.

Don't let yourself get stuck here, Realms. Our thoughts have a way of trapping us from moving forward. There isn't a human "bean" alive that couldn't use a good chat with a counsellor of some sort...

Don't give up...sending you strength and a good wollop of courage to look at this as an experience to urge you forward, rather than a place to settle.

Arminius

Posted on: 10/06/2007 01:02

I've always liked your posts, realmseer. You just see different realms than others, that's why you are being misunderstood. Don't let it trouble you. Being considered "mad" is a badge of honour. I've been considerd "mad" for about twenty years, and my low point was when even my father said so, and my wife wasn't sure. It'll blow over. Just remain true to yourself, and don't force yourself into something that you are not, merely to please others.

In "mad" solidarity,

Arminius

MadMonk

Posted on: 10/06/2007 09:24

:-(

RevJamesMurray

Posted on: 10/06/2007 20:12

I once saw a street busker at his best. As he worked up to the grand finale, the busker singled out a member of the audience. He yelled out "Sir, are you having fun?" The man said "Yes." The busker replied, "Then let your face know."
I was embarressed, because I was the man the busker singled out. It took me years to realize how stern I appeared to others. I thought I was being passionate, but everyone else saw it as passionately too intense. It is hard to gauge how others perceive us. I wish you well as you seek harmony & congruity in your life and how others perceive you.

stardust

Posted on: 10/06/2007 22:20

AW....realmseer

You are a poet and your heart overflows with love.
If only those people you speak of could know you
the way we do!
You sound like you have a really rough time.
You don't deserve it. I wish I could wave a magic
wand...abracadabra, poof.....and solve your problems.
I can only say you are a really good person.
Don't get down on yourself!

This Too Will Pass Away

If I can endure for this minute
Whatever is happening to me
No matter how heavy my heart is
Or how dark the moment might be.

If I can remain calm and quiet
With all my world crashing around me
Secure in the knowledge God loves me
When everyone else seems to doubt me.

If I can but keep on believing
What I know in my heart to be true
That darkness will fade with the morning
And that this will pass away too.

Then nothing in life can defeat me
For as long as this knowledge remains
I can suffer whatever is happening
For I know God will break all the chains.

That are binding me tight in the darkness
And trying to fill me with fear
For there is no night without dawning
And I know that my morning is near.

Author unknown

God be with realmseer. Send her strength, courage,wisdom,
love and hope for a better tomorrow.
Surround her with the Christ Light of Love and
The Christ Light of Protection,
that only GOOD may come to her
and only GOOD may go from her.
We ask and believe in the name of Jesus, the Christ. Amen
As we have believed so may it be done.

stardust

Posted on: 10/06/2007 22:31

realmseer : You like poetry. Here's another:

On that day when the weight deadens on your shoulders
and you stumble, may the clay dance to balance you.
And when the ghost of loss gets into you, may a flock of colors -
indigo, red, green, and azure blue - come to awaken in you
a meadow of delight.
When the canvas frays and the stain of ocean blackens
beneath you,
May there come across the waters a path of yellow moonlight
to bring you safely home.
May the nourishment of the earth be yours,
May the clarity of light be yours,
May the fluency of the ocean be yours,
May the protection of the ancestors be yours,
And so may a slow wind work these words
of love around you,
An invisible cloak to mind your life.

From Anam Cara by John O'Donahue ( an Irish poem)

Panentheist

Posted on: 10/07/2007 09:19

Realmseer,

Read your cry for attention, went to your site and read this about you:

"Interests
Love music of all kinds(mostly Metallica), reading fantasy(not romance), exploration of the human condition, the legal system, standing up for rightful justice even at my own expense, love writting songs that apparently are Godly and the concept of family closeness and friendly connections"

I don't know about anybody else, but I see here a catalogue of potentialities that would send many folks home filled with envy.

Agreed Realmseer, "Life can be a bitch". Even so, this is God's world and you are part of it. Focus on the talents you identified as being yours and start developping them. Your contributions will be legion!

Shalom.

realmseer

Posted on: 10/07/2007 19:37

Thanks guys ( and dolls). This means alot to me.

Neo

Posted on: 10/08/2007 00:45

Realmseer,

I've always enjoyed you posts and can say with all honesty that never once have I seen you "glaring at people" on the WonderCafe.

Keep your lights on,

Neo.