It's always a balancing act and there is attrition in it. Young people are increasing savvy about the net but unfortunately those who are up to no good are getting craftier as well, meaning people NEED to be increasingly savvy. There will always be those who are incautious and get taken advantage of but I think that was true before the internet as well. I think it's largely the same issues we've always faced, but they're coming at us faster than ever now. I truly think it's the pace of things that has changed the most.

Pilgrim - the Cafe is the only internet site I post to - unless you count e-mail.  I guess that, despite some things that have happened here, I take people at face value.  Occasionally I spot somebody that does't ring true - ie they sound like a teenage boy but claim to be a middle-aged woman.  But most people that I have met in person have turned out to be pretty much what they were like on the net.  Certainly on the net you came across as a person I could get along with very easily - and when we met it seemed like we already knew each other.  The only thing, in real life, their personalities come through all the more vividly.  But I've never met Crazyheart and I'm sure that we could start talking the minute we met and it would be hard for anyone to get a word in edgewise for quite awhile.  Some I've been surprised by their physical appearance - I had pictured them to look much more sophisticated (you know, wearing business attire, and dressing down to casual slacks - but never shorts and an old T-shirt. 

I don't post my picture or my real name here - mainly because I've talked so darn much about my kids and they deserve some privacy (so I post their toddler pictures).  But if I meet someone, say at my home church or at Presbytery, and we start chatting about the Wonder Cafe, I quickly identify myself as Seeler.

Its strange - some of the people I've known on the Cafe and then met in real life, I still think of by their user-name - others I've switched to thinking of by their real names.   I like to be called Seeler - or -------.  Qwerty will always be Qwerty to me.  Specialmom - well I haven't yet been able to think of her as Daisy or by her real name. 

But people I've known on the Cafe for awhile - I do trust that they are who they say they are.

Anonymous truth...hmmm.

I only say things I wouldn't in real life for the sake of letting something out that wouldn't be kooth to say in real life, for the purpose of self discovery, never for the sake of testing someone. And that's only occasional, besides, it depends who I were talking to whether or not I would say it in real life.

I don't considder myself anonymous though, I am Elanorgold, it's a name that applies to me, like others may call me by a nickname or pet name. I also have a name on Youtube, and a name on Amazon, and another name on another forum I use only infrequently now. I considder all these names to be aspects of me, like people remembering past lives perhaps. "When I was Sarah, or when I was James." I've also had some involvement with re-enacting where everyone has a "play" name that they considder as much a real name of theirs as their birth name, and this helps me accept user names as real.

It's amusing, how just about anything can become a name. Like on an old forum I used to frequent (my first, where I used my real name), there was a guy callet riv3t, prounounced "rivet" he said it was sort of his mating call.

I agree that there are huge advantages to the net. But we may be underestimating the damage it does.

When I was a kid, I read heavily, and was devoted to radio. Both were beneficial. My ability to read was what saved me in the years after I flunked out of school. Radio stimulated thought and imagination  because you had to concentrate and imagine the scene while you listened.

TV destroyed that. you did really learn much from the words because there was no need to use you brain at all. TV is simply a series of rapidly switching pictures. It's watched in a brain-dead state. There's not the slightest question people, especially children, have been losers with TV.

Now, I see my kids with computer. If they're on the web, the messages are trivial. More often, they're playiing games. When other kids come to visit, they get a contoller, and all sit around relating not to each other but to the screen. So kids lose out on the ability to socialize and interact.

I stopped watching TV a long time ago. I'm going to have to discipline myself on the web.

There can be good TV, well worth watching. The problem is that watchiing it is addictive - and most of what's on it is garbage - just changing images. That's why the camera angle changes every 10 to 20 seconds. So a great many people spend all evening watching TV, instead of skipping the bad shows and doing something else.

The Shadow was wonderful. "Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?" I believe his name was Lamont Cranston.

My ex-wife and younger son both have Asperger's and have both retreated from the internet and have shut themselves off from most people even from each other.  My ex became more violent and suicidal as time went on.  I suspect my late father in law also had AS.  (I understand there's a genetic component to the condition, but I have limited knowledge of the condition.)  I used to keep in contact with my son but now he only talks to my older son on Skype.  My ex got more suicidal as the AS got worse.  I hope your nephew continues to reach out through Facebook or other means to maintain that contact. 

I wouldn't write to people I work for or admire in the same way I write to some of the people on this site, but if they found out about my writing here, I wouldn't deny it was me.  Like I said before - I'm not ashamed of what I've written here, but that doesn't mean I talk like this to everyone.  It also doesn't mean that I can't be sarcastic if confronted with bad reasoning in real life.  Besides, there are enough chansens in this world that it's not like these posts are a direct link to my doorstep.

There is a phenom relief pitcher (used to be with the Red Sox, I think) who shares my full name, and I like to think he probably gets some grief for being an outspoken atheist ;)

I have mixed feelings about internet communication.  There is the criminal element: scams, spams, stalkers, and pedophiles.  I sometimes worry about it, especially for around my son.  We've educated him as best we can and my husband checks up on the type of sites he's visiting when he's doing matinance. 

Then there is the amazing support and resourses that people can find with the press of a few buttons.  I belong to a few transgender forums and I often wonder how my life may have been different if I could have reached out so easily when I was young.  If I could have posted my story and connected with others going through the same kind of thing and get advice from people who have already been through it.  Finding out about a local support or outreach group by email and getting more information before you go.  It's amazing what is available.

I do find that I have to be careful when looking up information on specific topics like when I was trying to find out more about my mom's cancer or my son's genetic disorder.  As long as I kept my filter on I was alright and got a heap of good information.