ahhh omni

You are correct that there are probably alot of things that have gone into her breaking up with you but that doesnt' really matter.

Perhaps it did bug her when you commented about shorts.  Perhaps you didnt' do x, y or z that she wanted.  Perhaps she thought the relationship was too serious or had run it's course.

Perhaps she has met some one else or any or thousands of reasons that people break up.

None of it really matters and it isn't worth your energy.

Sure be sad, but then get out with your other friends and have a blast.  It is the end of high school.  there are parties and picnics and swimming pools and lots to do.  my daughter is also graduating and most nights someone seems to be having a crowd over to cheer the end of school.  Participate.

As to the grad.  You know , I would call her and say  " so it seems kind of awkward to have you come to my grad when we are no longer dating.  I think it would be best to just forget it".  Maybe there is a girl at school , a good friend who is currently going alone or with a group and you can link up with her/them.  My daughter seems to be going with a group of 10 kids and all sitting together.

When my son broke up with his serious girl friend, he then realised that all of his friends and family had thought she was the wrong choice.  I also told him though that each girl you date tells you something about the type of girl you will marry and who will make you happy.

hugs to you and then a push out the door to see your friends

Hey Omni

life sucks sometimes :( 

I agree with Lastpointe.  Offer her a way out of the prom and go with friends.  Been there, dun that. 

Sounds to me (and I'm way on the outside here) like she needed things to change, and of course, her brain is looking for ways to make that ok.  There isn't a better way to do it. 

And she may be exploring herself as a person and her values, just as you are doing, and perhaps found some differences between you or some questions that she wasn't sure about.  That is a perfect reason for breaking up and trying a new life on for size.  It goes back to my comment "you can't go backward."  Maybe she saw a need to stop before going on.  And hopefully, she is being true to herself and realizing some other direction.  Thank goodness.  

A friend dated a guy for 6 years, through high school & more, until it was time to get engaged or break up.  They broke up.  Shocked the whole bunch of us, but afterwards, it was clear that both had spent some of the time trying to 'up' one another, be the perfect partner, live up to their image.  It was draining on both, and they have both moved on to be married with kids with other partners.  Life went on.  Slowly at first, but it did.

(((Hugs))) there are bright days ahead, and new discoveries... guaranteed.

Ah man, after all seemed to be going so well for you.

Big Hug

IT

Russ

Sorry to hear you are going through this, Omni. 

Thinking of you... P3

All I can offer is vibes and good wishes, Omni. Never been in the place you are so I can't offer any advice.

Mendalla

Aww, Omni, I feel for you. I'd suggest also canceling the tickets, but of course, call her and let her know that it's because it will be awkward. I don't think you should see that as you being "a dick", but as giving yourself some space. Enjoy sitting with the Green Tea Society. I can't imagine you'll be the ONLY one at prom without a date, unless there is a stupid tradition in your high school of people without dates not going to prom. I certainly didn't let my lack of a date stop ME!

This may sound trite, but lots of people break up at the end of high school. It seems like some sort of milestone. Lots of people break up at the end of their undergraduate degree too. Whether or not you know anyone who has broken up with or been dumped by their current girlfriend / boyfriend yet, you will soon.

((((((Omni))))))

So sorry to hear that I have to agree with everyone on the grad thing thouhg. Being foced (in a way) to be friends with someone you're not ready to be friends with again is really really hard to do especially since it seems like she'd be staying with you. Probably best if you tell her that it probably isn't a good plan.

Thinking of you

Sorry Omni. Sounds like she's not your type though. Hopefully, after you've graduated and you are on the next stage of your life, you will find someone who is more like-minded. Hope your graduation ceremony goes well.

Damn man, you don't need her at your grad. Tell her that! Like a month ago you were talkin about an apartment in the city and about maybe gettin' married an shat. That girl a muslim too or what? You ain't changing nobody, she want to wear revealing clothing she gonna. This was a long distance relationship wasn't it? She from your town or what? Maybe she's not coming to Grad to see you, maybe she got other friends there! I can't remember! You don't need her messin up your Grad brother. If there's one thing I know, it's this, "experience is the hardest teacher, she gives you the test first, and the lesson after". Learn your lesson, learn from this experience, you'll survive! It does sound cheap how she left you, cheap excuses, but she really does not want to be with you, that is obvious. You need to enjoy yourself with friends, that not gonna happen with her around! She should be the bigger person and let you do that! Ask her not to come, if she got any pity for your sorry ass she won't.

Omni - on the grad thing.  Some people can break up and still be friends.  My son and his finance broke their engagement just before the wedding of a mutual friend.  They attended the wedding together - seemed to enjoy themselves - and continued to be civil for years afterwards.  My daughter still is on facebook with the girl.

Years later the woman he had been living with for three years and hoped to marry and grow old with, decided that she liked his best friend better and kicked him out so the friend could move in.  Devastating for him.   They were both graduate students and there was a big dinner-thingy coming up at the university.  She would be there with her new boyfriend.  He had to give a presentation or receive a reward or something.  A friend from his off-campus job offered to go with him and be his 'date'.  It worked out.

Only the two of you can decide what is right about your grad.  I can't imagine her wanting to go to your graduation without you - so maybe she needs a way out.  Or maybe she wants to remain friends.  Can you handle just being friends at this point in your life? 

I am truly sorry for your pain.  I send you a big hug.  Can you get one from your Mom?  Do your parents know how you are suffering?

I could say all sorts of things, like 'better now than in 10 years', or 'its a good thing it happened before you started a family', but that wouldn't stop the hurt.  You pictured a lifetime together.  It's gone.  And it hurts.

Graduate, move to Edmonton, find a job and an apartment, go to university (you'll be surprised at the doors that will open to you), continue with your life.  I care.

Coming in a little late but sympathies to you Omni.  I doubt there are very many who have not been in your place.

My only advice in such situations is hold onto that dignity you have shown above, and trust me when I say you are just too darn good looking to remain on your own for long.

LB - sigh, to be 30 years younger

There is no remedy for love but to love more.     Henry David Thoreau

Ah Omni...  I've been dumped as a friend in a very similar way...  it seemed like all was well and then, she comes out saying we don't understand each other, but to her friends (and me, down the grape vine) she says all sorts of painful things that have been bothering her for a while but she didn't want to tell me directly... It's the worst feeling.  It's like, was I so totally blind that I didn't pick up on this stuff??  Was I totally naive about trust between us and all that??  Made me question the whole damn friendship, like I was on a totally different trip than my now-ex-friend was when it came to us...  But you know what I learned from it?  If my "friend" doesn't have the guts or the respect to tell me directly what the problem is long long before the whole thing comes to a screeching halt, then perhaps it wasn't a true friendship after all.  Now, I know things are a bit more complex in the romantic relationship version of friendship... but, I think, the basis is the same... or at least, needs to be to be lasting and true.

So, mourn the loss, and re-consider what you value in a relationship above all else.  It might help you to feel that perhaps this closure is for the best...

Blessings,

Nishy

Something I've learned along the way is that I often think I know what other people are thinking, or where they've come from. But the only way to know about a person is ask. And then if that person wants to hide something from you, if they don't feel comfortable sharing, you will never know. You may get a very different picture of a person.

Your situation reminds me of one that I encountered in high school. One of the girls in my class broke up with her boyfriend because she was not comfortable with how serious things were getting. She told me that he was starting to talk about them spending their life together and marriage and she felt terrified. She also didn't feel she could tell him because of how much it would hurt him. Probably would have been better if they'd had it out, but they were young and I'm pretty sure it was the first serious relationship for both of them.

As you said, it's not just the men who get frightened of committment.

If there's one thing that will get you in a bear trap everytime is thinking that gals are "innocent" I don't care what her parents think because in all honesty we show a different face to our parents and the less they know the better.

When all is said and done forget the negative , you did have some good times and you did spend a portion of your life with someone who cared and who probably will for a long time that is more than most people ever experience in a lifetime every one gets caught up in "forver and ever"

If you love for one day, one moment, or one second it really is something to cherish

If you want to really define yourself from your generation of dudes go the party try to control yourself and if you two get a moment alone...... wish her the best !

Yeah I know that sounds weird and it makes no sense but one day it will !
 

Ahhh ... I always suspected the Latin language had a purpose!!

((((((((Omni))))))))

Omni - enjoy your graduation.  Certainly talk things out.  But please protect yourself (and her) by not rushing things.   Take it day by day.  Be friends.  You've got a whole lot of time ahead - don't feel that everything has to be mapped out for the future. 

Hugs and best wishes.

Latin!?

Latin!?

I am glad that you are going to enjoy sharing your graduation with her but I wouldn't be rushing back into infatuation.

If she has done this whole " i breaking up now, no it was last month, i'm seeing other guys......." thing then she is either not wanting to be involved for whatever reason or

she is manipulative and pulling your chain.

Either is not a good thing