This is so worth watching right to the end....
And just in case that video doesn't work here is the link http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/en/brene_brown_on_vulnerability.html
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Comments
rishi
This is so extraordinarily
Posted on: 02/03/2012 10:30
This is so extraordinarily beautiful. It's also, I can't help but comment, a great example in my opinion of how a very fundamental gospel value can be pointed out, talked about, without using explicitly religious language.
chansen
That's probably because it
Posted on: 02/03/2012 10:42
That's probably because it was a "value" long before it was a "gospel value".
Arminius
Yes, the gospel truth without
Posted on: 02/03/2012 14:06
Yes, the gospel truth without the gospel terminology.
rishi
chansen wrote: That's
Posted on: 02/03/2012 14:33
That's probably because it was a "value" long before it was a "gospel value".
Ever since Adam was a boy, I'll betcha.
Beloved
. . . to let ourselves be
Posted on: 02/03/2012 16:26
. . . to let ourselves be seen - deeply seen, vulnerably seen . . .
. . . to love with all our hearts, even if there is no guarantee . . .
. . . to practise gratitude and joy . . .
. . . to believe that we are enough . . .
Berserk
My Summary of her Talk: We
Posted on: 02/03/2012 16:43
My Summary of her Talk: We feel trapped in shame because we feel unworthy and hence painfully vulnerable . Emotionally healthy people believe that vulnererability is beautiful, yet they still often numb themselves to this feeling. But when you numb vulnerabilty, you numb your other emotions as well. So we must develop the courage to be transparent risk takers.
Lesson for Christians: When we rightly believe we are unworthy of God's grace (= unmeritied favor), we create the danger of feeling unhealthily unworthy in our interpersonal relationships. Gospel Corrective: Many feel they are only lovable if they are worthy. We are in fact worthy because we are lovable and we are lovable because God loves us unconditionally. "Love your neighbor as yourself" is bad advice for a masochist!
Relevant Prooftext:
"In humility have self-esteem, and value yourself at your proper worth. Who can justify one who inflicts injuries on himself, or respect one who is full of self-contempt?...If someone is mean to himself, who does he benefit? No one is meaner than the person who is mean to himself (Ecclesiasticus 10:24-25; 14:4-5)
somegalfromcan
Anyone got a banana nut
Posted on: 02/03/2012 18:21
Anyone got a banana nut muffin?
Kimmio
somegalfromcan
Posted on: 02/04/2012 01:39
Anyone got a banana nut muffin?
lol! no, just a beer.
Kimmio
Berserk wrote: My Summary
Posted on: 02/04/2012 02:51
My Summary of her Talk: We feel trapped in shame because we feel unworthy and hence painfully vulnerable . Emotionally healthy people believe that vulnererability is beautiful, yet they still often numb themselves to this feeling. But when you numb vulnerabilty, you numb your other emotions as well. So we must develop the courage to be transparent risk takers.
Lesson for Christians: When we rightly believe we are unworthy of God's grace (= unmeritied favor), we create the danger of feeling unhealthily unworthy in our interpersonal relationships. Gospel Corrective: Many feel they are only lovable if they are worthy. We are in fact worthy because we are lovable and we are lovable because God loves us unconditionally. "Love your neighbor as yourself" is bad advice for a masochist!
Relevant Prooftext:
"In humility have self-esteem, and value yourself at your proper worth. Who can justify one who inflicts injuries on himself, or respect one who is full of self-contempt?...If someone is mean to himself, who does he benefit? No one is meaner than the person who is mean to himself (Ecclesiasticus 10:24-25; 14:4-5)
True. But we must do more than tell people to "snap out of it...because the scriptures say so..and God loves you" and what I mean by that is, not that what they say is wrong, but people's low sense of self worth is often so ingrained for such a long time, to simply tell them to stop feeling that way is often futile...and so to say that just makes a person feel even less understood...if they feel no love from others, neither for themselves, they are not likely to feel loved by God either, in my observation. We need to show them love that is tangable, so that they feel loved, and are able to love themselves and others..and feel open to God's love...or else the words are just empty words to them.
And what about people who are legitimately ashamed of some of their past behaviour (eg. I can think of lots of instances where I could have done things differently but didn't...I could have been less selfish, I could have tried harder, I could have been kinder, more generous etc...so I understand the dliema even though I try to forgive myself. I grew up in a home where there was no good enough and this was a barrier for my self esteem...I never measured up in the eyes of those who loved me, and there was very little forgiveness)...sometimes people really do behave poorly, really could have done better, and have regrets...and perhaps their existing sense low self worth contributed to their poor choices...how do we help them (or ourselves) salvage their true worth so they have self respect...without that turning into false pride that our secular society praises? There is also a paradox in the Bible sometimes--if we take certain scriptures literally-- between the total condemnation and punishment for sin, and the total expectation of forgiveness. I know I struggle with that on my faith journey...because the Bible seems to teach that everyone is loved, yet noone deserves it...and in other places it teaches "do not be unevenly yoked, and have nothing to do with the whoremongerers, the drunkards, etc., etc, etc. Honestly, it teaches contradictory things, or at least appears to (which is why I want to understand the proper original context, and all the changes that have been made to it and why,not just the western version and teaching we have now)...the truth is, someone with low self esteem is less likely to know how to accept grace. I brought this up in another thread but it didn't get a response. I am, these days, leaning toward a more universalist view of God who loves everyone, and everyone is worthy whether they feel worthy or not...because I can't invision a God who is less forgiving than I am capable of being, or a loving God who holds a grudge, when we are commanded not to...that just doesn't make sense....I might make another thread about it though because it's bound to stray from the OP.
seeler
My initial reaction to this
Posted on: 02/04/2012 08:44
My initial reaction to this video was to burst out clapping, alone in my den. Great!!!
Now I'll think about it and read the comments.
Thanks Muskoka for sharing.
seeler
Somegal - come over to the
Posted on: 02/04/2012 09:04
Somegal - come over to the Room for All. I have raisin bran muffins. Will they do?
Thinking more about this beautiful message. I don't need anyone to analysis it for me. She did an excellent job conveying her message. The 'dull the pain and dull everything'. I think this happens to everyone to a greater or lesser degree. We ignor the hurt. We turn off the hurt. We run, and run, and run. Or we push our bodies to exercise. Or we (this is my escape) play one game of Solitaire after another until another hour is used up. Or we (someone close to me) become obsessive/compulsive - paying more attention to our 'routines' than to why we are doing them. Or we lay down on the couch and turn on the TV and turn off the world around us. And we miss out - we lay there on the couch while our children are growing up around us. We shut off; and we shut off the good with the bad, and we are dead inside.
But we are born in the image of God. Not perfect in the world's sight (my granddaughter had a deformed ear, I was born nearsighted and tone deaf), but perfect in our imperfection - not a china doll, but a human being to be loved and cherished not because we are perfect, not in spite of our imperfection, but because that is who we are.
That's what I got out of this today. Others probably got a somewhat different message. And when I listen to it next week, I will probably get something more or different - I expect so.
LBmuskoka
seeler wrote: But we are
Posted on: 02/04/2012 10:45
But we are born in the image of God. Not perfect in the world's sight (my granddaughter had a deformed ear, I was born nearsighted and tone deaf), but perfect in our imperfection - not a china doll, but a human being to be loved and cherished not because we are perfect, not in spite of our imperfection, but because that is who we are.
That's what I got out of this today. Others probably got a somewhat different message. And when I listen to it next week, I will probably get something more or different - I expect so.
Beautiful Seeler, that is what I heard as well.
I consider myself lucky in the fact that long ago the people who mattered to me told me I did not have to be "perfect". Their stories were "whole hearted" and full of grace. They granted permission and acceptance. Their lesson: That perfection is what is achieved at the end; that life is a work in progress, a journey of discovery, and that failure is just as important as success.
Over time this has evolved into a belief that I, nor anyone else, needs to be imprisoned by absolutes or definitions particulaly those imposed by others. We all possess the ability to recognize when those definitions are wrong, the next step is to draw on the courage to break the chains.
Rarely do we realize that we are in the midst of the extraordinary. Miracles occur all around us, signs from God show us the way, angels plead to be heard, but we pay little attention to them because we have been taught that we must follow certain formulas and rules if we want to find God. We do not recognize that God is wherever we allow Him/Her to enter.
Traditional religious practices are important: they allow us to share with others the communal experience of adoration and prayer. But we must never forget that spiritual experience is above all a practical experience of love. And with love, there are no rules.
Paulo Coelho, By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept
Arminius
LBmuskoka wrote: Rarely do
Posted on: 02/04/2012 14:46
Rarely do we realize that we are in the midst of the extraordinary. Miracles occur all around us, signs from God show us the way, angels plead to be heard, but we pay little attention to them because we have been taught that we must follow certain formulas and rules if we want to find God. We do not recognize that God is wherever we allow Him/Her to enter.
Traditional religious practices are important: they allow us to share with others the communal experience of adoration and prayer. But we must never forget that spiritual experience is above all a practical experience of love. And with love, there are no rules.
Paulo Coelho, By the River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept
LBmuskoka
I found this while being
Posted on: 02/07/2012 08:06
I found this while being inspired by another of Dr. Brown's talks on this subject ....
For a Canadian, in the depths of a rather snowless winter, I found it to be a "perfect" analogy
*************
Perfectly Imperfect
We have all heard that no two snowflakes are alike. Each snowflake takes the perfect form for the maximum efficiency and effectiveness for its journey. And while the universal force of gravity gives them a shared destination, the expansive space in the air gives each snowflake the opportunity to take their own path. They are on the same journey, but each takes a different path.
Along this gravity-driven journey, some snowflakes collide and damage each other, some collide and join together, some are influenced by wind... there are so many transitions and changes that take place along the journey of the snowflake. But, no matter what the transition, the snowflake always finds itself perfectly shaped for its journey.
I find parallels in nature to be a beautiful reflection of grand orchestration. One of these parallels is of snowflakes and us. We, too, are all headed in the same direction. We are being driven by a universal force to the same destination. We are all individuals taking different journeys and along our journey, we sometimes bump into each other, we cross paths, we become altered... we take different physical forms. But at all times we too are 100% perfectly imperfect. At every given moment we are absolutely perfect for what is required for our journey. I’m not perfect for your journey and you’re not perfect for my journey, but I’m perfect for my journey and you’re perfect for your journey. We’re heading to the same place, we’re taking different routes, but we’re both exactly perfect the way we are.
Think of what understanding this great orchestration could mean for relationships. Imagine interacting with others knowing that they too each share this parallel with the snowflake. Like you, they are headed to the same place and no matter what they may appear like to you, they have taken the perfect form for their journey. How strong our relationships would be if we could see and respect that we are all perfectly imperfect for our journey.
Steve Maraboli, Life, the Truth, and Being Free
*****************
WaterBuoy
Can you imagine someone
Posted on: 02/07/2012 11:02
Can you imagine someone clinging to an old ideal as conservatism ... admitting that it might have been wrong?
Busting out of that situation would be wrong in the institutional sense! Omi Gaw' dime glad I'm a fringe person (coin) even tho' it made my family hate me ... for being different and searching for what's ellusive to those in the box ...
And thus the daemons RIP'el across space, as they can't see themselves as wealth and power ... that's descrypt ...
It is difficult to define nothing and infinite ... so the rich and powerful pude eM in the Tome ... that's the word and both the Romans and Judean sons would not except anything beyond their norm ... you did know Judain referred to Ju'pi'd'ur as the largest around ... not maybe the brightest ... but one has to live by imposed roué that few question! Afraid to goth 'ere like thos mon quis in a circe ... of excluded sensations ... not a tho'Tae ...
Thought E's latent to living people that are tough ...
Arminius
Yes, LB, a "perfect" Canadian
Posted on: 02/07/2012 11:15
Yes, LB, a "perfect" Canadian analogy. Thanks.
Panentheism
chansen wrote: That's
Posted on: 02/07/2012 13:38
That's probably because it was a "value" long before it was a "gospel value".
Here is an example of control that she speaks of. Of course it was a value from the beginning of human history. If one studies anthropology one discovers this has been a religious value. It gets actualized in many ways. The hebrew tradition speaks of it, this sunday the 2 Kings 5:1-14 passage is about this - a upper class man is forced to become vulnerable which leads to his healing. AS we proceed history this "value' gets told in new ways. Again this sunday the mark passage is about this value.
The point made is we can see this in the gospel and it can be learned there. But it is not the only place it can be learned. The other point is an idea from religion gets secularized and we can trace that idea until it now is not always seen as a gospel value. That is good. However for those of us for whom church matters we can make the connection with those who are part of our community. We can make connections with this video and what the text is for this sunday. It is a reinforcing of this insight of vulneraliblity.
The theological connection can be made - religion is given as a formation of character. What this religion as an emotion gets a human construction. The idea of the vulnerablity of God can be a connecting trope. Of course, there are religions that are evil and we see their connecting trope is a God who controls and is not at heart vulnerable ( the supernatural theism is an example) thus control is the dogma - accept this or you are not worthy. The panentheistic model begins with you are worthy by nature and the lure of God is to value up worthiness, and to address those things that create shame so we overcome it. The lure of God begins in both vulnerablity and worth.
chansen
"The lure of God begins in
Posted on: 02/07/2012 14:43
"The lure of God begins in both vulnerablity and worth."
You know, I appreciate your attempts to make Christianity less dogmatic and less insane, but your marketing department sucks. Panentheists really need to learn how to write to an audience, instead of just each other.
chansen
rishi wrote: chansen
Posted on: 02/07/2012 14:43
That's probably because it was a "value" long before it was a "gospel value".
Ever since Adam was a boy, I'll betcha.
You're too smart to believe in a literal Adam, I'd bet.
Mendalla
chansen wrote: "The lure of
Posted on: 02/07/2012 16:39
"The lure of God begins in both vulnerablity and worth."
You know, I appreciate your attempts to make Christianity less dogmatic and less insane, but your marketing department sucks. Panentheists really need to learn how to write to an audience, instead of just each other.
Amen, chansen. I'm someone who has interests in both panentheism and process theology (they are not automatically the same thing) and one of the biggest problems I see is a lack of good, plain language discussions of what they, in particular process, mean to the folks in the pews and streets. There's a lot of good theology and philosophy around these ideas, but it's not always getting distilled in a way that is, as you suggest, marketable so that there ends up being a lot of preaching to the converted.
Mendalla
Panentheism
"The lure of God begins in
Posted on: 02/07/2012 17:03
"The lure of God begins in both vulnerablity and worth."
Ok - yes short hand. Here is a longer piece.
If there is Love Supreme within experience and can be felt, and if that Love Supreme has an agenda of love, compassion and justice, that love is to be felt. It may orginate in awe, the sense we all have in the experience of something more, watching the sunset, experiencing a piece of music that makes us stop in our tracks, lifting a new born baby, the moment we see our beloved and connect, and feel a rush of emotion, watching our grandson make that play in hockey. What that awe is is in some sense a mystery; poetry and music and art and even some forms of religous experience, give us hints. This love is in every moment, connects us, ties us together, pushes us on. It is a lure to deeper connecting, if you will, a tease that calls us to compassion. One of the ways we speak of, and experience, this Love Supreme is as worth, calling the best out of us, affirming us as worthy of love. Another way that experience comes to us is in vulnerabilty, when we open ourselves, in a moment of solitude, to a hint, that we share common experience. And that Love Supreme is also vulnerable to us, open to us, feeling us, responding to us. Thus when we know our vulnerablity and that deep down we are worthy because we are connected, to Love Supreme and to others. And sometimes that call to love is only experienced in aesthetic ways, and within the intimate relating we have. We don't have to name it, but it is there as the connecting of love in all experience. And it is good enough for a moment, and for some, not to name it, but to feel the fact of being loved and connected.
MC jae
somegalfromcan
Posted on: 02/07/2012 17:54
Anyone got a banana nut muffin?
I can hook you up with one.
chansen
Panentheism wrote: "The
Posted on: 02/07/2012 18:08
"The lure of God begins in both vulnerablity and worth."
Ok - yes short hand. Here is a longer piece.
If there is Love Supreme within experience and can be felt, and if that Love Supreme has an agenda of love, compassion and justice, that love is to be felt. It may orginate in awe, the sense we all have in the experience of something more, watching the sunset, experiencing a piece of music that makes us stop in our tracks, lifting a new born baby, the moment we see our beloved and connect, and feel a rush of emotion, watching our grandson make that play in hockey. What that awe is is in some sense a mystery; poetry and music and art and even some forms of religous experience, give us hints. This love is in every moment, connects us, ties us together, pushes us on. It is a lure to deeper connecting, if you will, a tease that calls us to compassion. One of the ways we speak of, and experience, this Love Supreme is as worth, calling the best out of us, affirming us as worthy of love. Another way that experience comes to us is in vulnerabilty, when we open ourselves, in a moment of solitude, to a hint, that we share common experience. And that Love Supreme is also vulnerable to us, open to us, feeling us, responding to us. Thus when we know our vulnerablity and that deep down we are worthy because we are connected, to Love Supreme and to others. And sometimes that call to love is only experienced in aesthetic ways, and within the intimate relating we have. We don't have to name it, but it is there as the connecting of love in all experience. And it is good enough for a moment, and for some, not to name it, but to feel the fact of being loved and connected.
I'll take that as, "We're working on it."
rishi
chansen wrote: You're too
Posted on: 02/07/2012 18:19
You're too smart to believe in a literal Adam, I'd bet.
I can't really be sure about Adam, but I'm pretty sure that I'm not literal.
LBmuskoka
chansen wrote:Panentheism
Posted on: 02/08/2012 09:14
"The lure of God begins in both vulnerablity and worth."
Ok - yes short hand. Here is a longer piece.
If there is Love Supreme within experience and can be felt, and if that Love Supreme has an agenda of love, compassion and justice, that love is to be felt. It may orginate in awe, the sense we all have in the experience of something more, watching the sunset, experiencing a piece of music that makes us stop in our tracks, lifting a new born baby, the moment we see our beloved and connect, and feel a rush of emotion, watching our grandson make that play in hockey. What that awe is is in some sense a mystery; poetry and music and art and even some forms of religous experience, give us hints. This love is in every moment, connects us, ties us together, pushes us on. It is a lure to deeper connecting, if you will, a tease that calls us to compassion. One of the ways we speak of, and experience, this Love Supreme is as worth, calling the best out of us, affirming us as worthy of love. Another way that experience comes to us is in vulnerabilty, when we open ourselves, in a moment of solitude, to a hint, that we share common experience. And that Love Supreme is also vulnerable to us, open to us, feeling us, responding to us. Thus when we know our vulnerablity and that deep down we are worthy because we are connected, to Love Supreme and to others. And sometimes that call to love is only experienced in aesthetic ways, and within the intimate relating we have. We don't have to name it, but it is there as the connecting of love in all experience. And it is good enough for a moment, and for some, not to name it, but to feel the fact of being loved and connected.
I'll take that as, "We're working on it."
And is that such a bad thing?
If the fundamental complaint against "fundamentalism" is that they have *all* the answers, then "working on it" is heading in a better direction, no?
Perhaps I have misread your words?
(and have you ever looked at peas in a pod? I mean, really looked at them? There's not a chance you'd mistake one for another, after a minute's close inspection.)
Neil Gaiman, American Gods
chansen
LBmuskoka wrote: chansen
Posted on: 02/08/2012 09:33
I'll take that as, "We're working on it."
And is that such a bad thing?
If the fundamental complaint against "fundamentalism" is that they have *all* the answers, then "working on it" is heading in a better direction, no?
Perhaps I have misread your words?
(and have you ever looked at peas in a pod? I mean, really looked at them? There's not a chance you'd mistake one for another, after a minute's close inspection.)
Neil Gaiman, American Gods
What you're working on, is marketing. You're working on presenting panentheism as a viable alternative to batshiat insane Christianity with a talking snake in a garden leading ultimately to a God killing his son in some bizarre self-satisfying ritual. The problem is, you use obscure words and long explanations that go nowhere, and people are going to tune you out.
The best I can get out of your explanations is that you're really impressed by nature and art and beauty, and that you feel a connection to all of it. Join the club. That doesn't makes religious - it makes you human. In fact, you sound a bit like a drunk atheist. At least you seem to think you're hearing voices, so you have the start of a religious belief.
But to tie this back to Christianity, is to ruin it. You'd be building panentheism not over sand, but over dynamite.
Panentheism
Of course in the area of
Posted on: 02/08/2012 11:15
Of course in the area of marketing all liberal and some evangelicals have to overcome the voices presented in the media - the conservative right/fundalmentalists. Marketing is done by small groups - face to face - because for the most part ideas are not sound bits.
There are voices out there in the media who do, out of a process perspective and other progressive ideas, attempt to deal with ideas. They too face a problem. For example Doug Todd ( you an follow him http://blogs.vancouversun.com/category/staff/life/spirituality/the-search/) gets attacked by atheists and fundamentalists for his thoughtful reconstruction of faith. But I think chansen would have the same problem with him as he does with me. Many who react negatively actually do not engage the ideas but argue out of their preconceived ideas, and/or the ideas presented do not fit with the ideas they hold as this must be the defination of religion or belief.
Here is the basic problem: "The best I can get out of your explanations is that you're really impressed by nature and art and beauty, and that you feel a connection to all of it. Join the club. That doesn't makes religious - it makes you human. In fact, you sound a bit like a drunk atheist. At least you seem to think you're hearing voices, so you have the start of a religious belief." These sentences indicate a missing of the points. For example the anthropolical claim that religion is what is what creates culture ( C Geertz) and culture makes us human (C Geetrz). There is both false and true religion and religion evolves. Now there is in the history of ideas religious doctrines which are the attempts to make concrete this idea:Religon is the art and the theory of humanity, so far as it depends on the person themselves and on what is permanent in the nature of things. So religions have ritual, doctrine,( rationalising) beilef which change over time.
But why the heaing of voices comment? What are the obscure words? Love. Poertry. Experience. Awe? Transcendence?All theology is mythic/poetic. This does not mean it is non rational or non empirical. It begins with the idea that to be human is to experience some sense of awe. That is a given or as you say is to be human ( which I agree with). To be human is to experience some sense of a moment of transcendence, as sense of something beyond us, which can be said only poetically - there is the love of the other that creates in us a sense of worth, we feel in out body the love that comes from the other - we connect to be lovers in dangerous times. Or as the novel put ( EM Forrester) only connect as that which makes us human - connecting at the most initmate and self transcending way - that changes us interanlly and creates our characte which determines how we will live.
I don't hear voices, I feel connections with the world and individuals. This is true of us all. Then comes puting into words that feeling.
Yes such a theology does challange fundamentalism and literal ( the litrallism of an atheist who contiuues to reduce christianity to some literal snake, and some literal garden and some adam) but it is within the evolving history of Judaism and Christianity. Both have changed over time but what is constant is there is some Love Supreme who works in the world calling us to the common good, of justice, peace, and compassion. And the nature of that Love Supreme is compassion and relational. And that Love Supreme is influenced by this relationality, that is effected and affecting by what is and is constant in always offering in each moment the possiblity of more beauty. This idea can be traced through history, but each attempt to state it is always incomplete and time bound, context bound. Each generation finds new words to state this basic understanding of the idea that we are called to connect for the sake of the common good, and for our own sakes. We find new words to express this belief. And we are back to it is good enough for a start, and it does not come in sound bits, but only in engagement. And some of that engagement is trying to put into words, through dance, music, poetry and fiction and art, and science hints of this mystery which is at the heart of the universe and has a stake on how we weave our lives, and depends on that weaving. Note what is being said is metaphor and metaphors are our best aproximatization of what is real.
LBmuskoka
(No subject)
Posted on: 02/09/2012 07:27
WaterBuoy
Can the world survive without
Posted on: 02/09/2012 09:24
Can the world survive without sum form of Ideal-ism ... a belief fore moving on? That primal power ah ... like Webster defines ID ...?
Make those enthralled with da Tome as unconscious mind draw something from IT as outside theID ... Eris of dissonance ... the chaos of word extracted from silent tho'T?
Then what if you don't believe in the soul of God which isn't ... or according to St Nick of Cusa ... lives somewhere else ... des other 's IDe! Dark hue Meris ... or just bloody phun ... ah something to amuse the hier powers ... heiros gammas? That's sacred ah ... like "X" a beginning ... for another round ... similar to a warped song ... wadis dimension as th' pithys IDe ... of de vassal ...
spiritbear
I was intrigued by Beserk's
Posted on: 02/09/2012 11:08
I was intrigued by Beserk's scriptural references, but couldn't locate them until I realized that Ecclesiasticus is not Ecclesiastes. It is a book (?from the Apocrypha?) that is also called Sirach. Also found out that the first reference is to Ecclestiasticus (Sirach) 10:28-29 rather than 24-25. Just in case someone wants to read further in this. I hadn't been introduced to this book before (it's not in the established canon for most protestants), and I realized that I should give it a closer look. But that will require some hunting as many bibles don't incorporate this book.
WaterBuoy
What, Berserks poken in
Posted on: 02/09/2012 11:11
What,
Berserks poken in tongues ...?
spiritbear
The difficulty in approaching
Posted on: 02/09/2012 11:32
The difficulty in approaching this video is that many will try to apply the same measuring stick to all people. Yes there are people, who (often unrightly), feel themselves "unworthy". But because God forgives, they are in fact worthy. The biblical emphasis on humility isn't addressing these people. It is addressing those who feel themselves more worthy than others, and one of the consequences of this is often their need to show themselves to be more worthy by shaming others. And that robs others of their worth, or their connectiveness with others, as the video proposes. How worthy is that?
The Christian approach is to level - to say that all are unworthy. But it doesn't stop there, as many would imply. We are made worthy even though we don't need to "do" anything to get to that point. And when we realize that we don't need to justify how "worthy" we are, and free ourselves from those chains, it allows us to lift up both ourselves and others. And that's where gratitude comes in.
The video briefly mentions gratitude. How can you have gratitude if your "self-worthiness" is the belief that you "deserve" everything you have or want? Isn't gratitude more about being thankful for what we have been given but don't deserve? Where we have harvested but have not planted? And that self of "deserving" or entitlement is often based on no more than the product of chance - having had supportive parents, wise and giving teachers, good health, being in the right place at the right time when looking for a job or career. Basing your self-worth on good fortune is a trap, because chance could just as easily go the other way. And so when we experience that good fortune, how do those with the "courage to be imperfect" (I like that phrase from the video) respond? I would hope by sharing that good fortune. Those who feel themselves "worthy" without being gracious to others are perhaps a little less worthy than they think.
Panentheism
No human phenomenon in this
Posted on: 02/09/2012 13:40
No human phenomenon in this global age is more controversial or confusing than religion. But two things are clear: secular prophecies to the contrary, religion is not going away. And despite the hopes of certain nostalgic believers, religion will not regain, at least in the West, the social ascendancy it once enjoyed.
We are all outsiders. All of us, no matter what we believe, stand outside traditions to which the vast majority of other human beings belong. The lesson to draw from this inescapable fact of the human condition is the need for a profound humility about one's own beliefs, especially when they are the kinds of beliefs that one cannot fully test in the company of others. In "The Predicament of Belief," these facts compel us to call for a "religious minimalism" across the world's traditions. For example, those whose religious experiences and values give rise to inescapably Christian convictions become Christian minimalists when they learn to hold their beliefs with humility and a certain lightness of touch.
We suggest that the humility of religious minimalism is the right stance for everyone, believers and non-believers alike, to adopt -- especially in an age in which the rich plurality of human beliefs has never been more evident, more exciting... or more dangerous.
MC jae
spiritbear wrote: Isn't
Posted on: 02/09/2012 17:03
Isn't gratitude more about being thankful for what we have been given but don't deserve? Where we have harvested but have not planted? And that self of "deserving" or entitlement is often based on no more than the product of chance - having had supportive parents, wise and giving teachers, good health, being in the right place at the right time when looking for a job or career. Basing your self-worth on good fortune is a trap, because chance could just as easily go the other way. And so when we experience that good fortune, how do those with the "courage to be imperfect" (I like that phrase from the video) respond? I would hope by sharing that good fortune. Those who feel themselves "worthy" without being gracious to others are perhaps a little less worthy than they think.
Life isn't about getting all you want. It's about wanting all you get.
Arminius
MorningCalm wrote: Life
Posted on: 02/10/2012 03:27
Life isn't about getting all you want. It's about wanting all you get.
Well, MC, if you want all you get, then you get all you want.
LBmuskoka
spiritbear wrote: The video
Posted on: 02/10/2012 08:32
The video briefly mentions gratitude. How can you have gratitude if your "self-worthiness" is the belief that you "deserve" everything you have or want? Isn't gratitude more about being thankful for what we have been given but don't deserve? Where we have harvested but have not planted? And that self of "deserving" or entitlement is often based on no more than the product of chance - having had supportive parents, wise and giving teachers, good health, being in the right place at the right time when looking for a job or career. Basing your self-worth on good fortune is a trap, because chance could just as easily go the other way. And so when we experience that good fortune, how do those with the "courage to be imperfect" (I like that phrase from the video) respond? I would hope by sharing that good fortune. Those who feel themselves "worthy" without being gracious to others are perhaps a little less worthy than they think.
The video extensively mentions "vulnerability" and the willingness to admit to being "wrong" and "imperfect". By developing those traits one is able to connect with others with empathy.
Once one recognizes that one is both vulnerable and worthy, the fear is removed. I can still connect to others even when they try and "shame", "blame" or manipulate my emotions to reach agreement. I don't have to shut them out and I don't have to numb myself to avoid the negative emotions that are created by such attempts.
When fear is removed I can hear what the other person is saying because I am no longer creating defenses for self protection. The replacement of fear with worthiness builds the courage to accept oneself and another without imposition.
Only then can one truly share fortune, good or bad, because it frees both to define their own success and sense of worth. In this way the needs of each other are recognized and accepted.
From here gratitude is created and it is real gratitude not one based on "obligation". It is not an extorted debt to be paid by submission. It is a thankfulness born from being recognized, accepted and worthy for who you are and who you will become, warts and all.
We are all outsiders. All of us, no matter what we believe, stand outside traditions to which the vast majority of other human beings belong. The lesson to draw from this inescapable fact of the human condition is the need for a profound humility about one's own beliefs, especially when they are the kinds of beliefs that one cannot fully test in the company of others.
Humility, vulnerability, empathy and self worth are all intertwined; each builds on the other to create connection between unique individuals to become cohesive communities.
The idea was fantastically, wildly improbable. But like most fantastically, wildly improbable ideas it was at least as worthy of consideration as a more mundane one to which the facts had been strenuously bent to fit.
Douglas Adams, The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul
WaterBuoy
LBM, Grand piece from that
Posted on: 02/10/2012 10:04
LBM,
Grand piece from that dark sea of de soul thing ... somewhat mystical ... few can find IT ...
In it's humble form went subliminal for authoritarian types didn't like IT ... soud on de Mira ...
airclean33
MorningCalm
Posted on: 02/10/2012 13:55
Where we have harvested but have not planted? And that self of "deserving" or entitlement is often based on no more than the product of chance - having had supportive parents, wise and giving teachers, good health, being in the right place at the right time when looking for a job or career. Basing your self-worth on good fortune is a trap, because chance could just as easily go the other way. And so when we experience that good fortune, how do those with the "courage to be imperfect" (I like that phrase from the video) respond? I would hope by sharing that good fortune. Those who feel themselves "worthy" without being gracious to others are perhaps a little less worthy than they think.
Life isn't about getting all you want. It's about wanting all you get.
Pilgrims Progress
LBmuskoka wrote: The
Posted on: 02/10/2012 16:56
The video extensively mentions "vulnerability" and the willingness to admit to being "wrong" and "imperfect". By developing those traits one is able to connect with others with empathy.
Once one recognizes that one is both vulnerable and worthy, the fear is removed. I can still connect to others even when they try and "shame", "blame" or manipulate my emotions to reach agreement. I don't have to shut them out and I don't have to numb myself to avoid the negative emotions that are created by such attempts.
It's one thing to avoid another's emotional manipulation to "blame" and "shame" us - it's far,far, harder to deal with the shame we own ourselves.........
It's our sense of shame, rather than the shame and blame cast on us by others, that causes us the most pain, IMO.
Try this as an experiment.
The next time you are in conflict with someone and your feelings are hurt - instead of just "blaming" them and justifying yourself (which is our usual response), go further - ask yourself is what's really upsetting you that they've triggered one of your "shame" areas?
"I'm not ................. enough?"
Whatever that "blank" is, it's a clue to your own sense of shame.
Humility, vulnerability, empathy and self worth are all intertwined; each builds on the other to create connection between unique individuals to become cohesive communities.
A word about empathy, vulnerability and self worth.
These work best when shared in relationship.
In my closest relationships I've risked my vulnerability with the other - and they have reciprocated by sharing their vulnerability with me. We know and support each other in our areas of shame, doubt and imperfections.
From my own experience, to find a soul mate, requires nothing less...........
Kimmio
airclean33 wrote: .
Posted on: 02/10/2012 17:27
.
[/quote]
lol! same here.
MC jae
Arminius wrote: MorningCalm
Posted on: 02/10/2012 21:15
Life isn't about getting all you want. It's about wanting all you get.
Well, MC, if you want all you get, then you get all you want.
What I was saying Arminius is that people should be content and thankful for whatever they get in life rather than complaining and being bitter about that which they haven't received or been able to achieve.
MC jae
airclean33 wrote:Evil can use
Posted on: 02/10/2012 21:17
Yes AC, I agree.
WaterBuoy
That is what you generally
Posted on: 02/10/2012 21:21
That is what you generally hear from the satisfied;
Just before they do the divers thing in de moor ... awesome spectre for dem below!
Yet hoo is really aware among the un-needy portions?
Arminius
MorningCalm wrote: Arminius
Posted on: 02/10/2012 21:28
Life isn't about getting all you want. It's about wanting all you get.
Well, MC, if you want all you get, then you get all you want.
What I was saying Arminius is that people should be content and thankful for whatever they get in life rather than complaining and being bitter about that which they haven't received or been able to achieve.
Yes, MC, I realize that. I was trying to say the same.
MC jae
Arminius wrote: Yes,
Posted on: 02/10/2012 21:31
Yes, MC, I realize that. I was trying to say the same.
Hey hey, we agree, latte for you.
Arminius
Hi MC: If there's a
Posted on: 02/10/2012 21:41
Hi MC:
If there's a latte for every agreement, I'll agree with you more often.
Kimmio
WaterBuoy wrote: That is
Posted on: 02/11/2012 00:56
That is what you generally hear from the satisfied;
Just before they do the divers thing in de moor ... awesome spectre for dem below!
Yet hoo is really aware among the un-needy portions?
Very true. When saying such things we should all realize that people are sick and dying who do not have the very basics. Would any of us be happy with that? How dare we say they should be happy with what they have, as we live in relative comfort....internet access and all! Let them eat cake?
LBmuskoka
Pilgrims Progress
Posted on: 02/11/2012 08:25
It's one thing to avoid another's emotional manipulation to "blame" and "shame" us - it's far,far, harder to deal with the shame we own ourselves.........
It's our sense of shame, rather than the shame and blame cast on us by others, that causes us the most pain, IMO.
Try this as an experiment.
The next time you are in conflict with someone and your feelings are hurt - instead of just "blaming" them and justifying yourself (which is our usual response), go further - ask yourself is what's really upsetting you that they've triggered one of your "shame" areas?
"I'm not ................. enough?"
Whatever that "blank" is, it's a clue to your own sense of shame.
I agree that most negative emotions comes from within; I certainly know that it does in my own case... but...
once that clue has been discovered one needs to get past it or the cycle will repeat.
There is a danger in taking all the negativity and placing it on one's own shoulders creating the assumption that "everything is my fault, responsibility, burden". Self shaming is just as problematic, I would say more problematic, than dealing with the shame placed by another.
I say get past the shame. Be as kind and understanding to ourselves as we would like to be toward another or they to us. Accept the human fragility, imperfection, screw ups; lose the fear of making mistakes because if we don't we become paralyzed.
Once I accept myself, recognize my inherent self worth eventhough I know I'm not perfect, that I don't have all the answers, that I make mistakes, I can move past the blame and shame and move forward even if moving forward is smack into another obstacle.
Humility, vulnerability, empathy and self worth are all intertwined; each builds on the other to create connection between unique individuals to become cohesive communities.
A word about empathy, vulnerability and self worth.
These work best when shared in relationship.
They certainly do.
Sharing is a mutual, not exclusive, relationship. Sharing recognizes that each person has something of value to offer, that one person does not possess all the answers but in working together answers will be found. By recognizing the worthiness in ourselves and others we can build on our strengths and minimize our weaknesses; we can see each other as unique but not alone.
The boy and his heart had become friends, and neither was capable now of betraying the other.
Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist
WaterBuoy
Kimmio, Those that are
Posted on: 02/11/2012 09:18
Kimmio,
Those that are insensitive to the poor and oppressed?
IOZeus called em hard-shuols ... stones with which to build a temple of Tome ... and someone hinted at tearing it down to build something better ...
They be well-bred in the next flip ... that's a kin to reversion or even an eccos in vast space of the indeterminate and uncertifiable state of God ... that's all0there-is tuit!
Alas in the quantum creation some become more hard-shelled and others and go thro' the mille many times before dah phloer'n on the threshold ... That's Dae Goan in old scrypt ... verily dark ... people don't like dark as they fear androgyny ... being tucked under a Ka Babbage Lief! That's how the story goes ... one page at a time?