samantha... prayers for a miracle are coming... i just lit a candle, and it will stay lit all day to remind me to offer up a little prayer every time i look at it.

please, samantha, go and talk to someone who can help you right now.  i know that you are worried SICK about your friends, but i think that the best thing that you can do for them right now is to take good care of their good friend YOU so that you will be healthy enough to be there for them when they show up again.

i am worried about you, samantha... please, avail yourself to a minister, priest, doctor, or health professional a.s.a.p. and get yourself some help to calm down.  if it were me, i would go to my massage therapist, who helps me calm down by breathing and therapeutic massage.

something like that, anyways.

you are no good to your friends if you allow yourself to become ill with worry.  please, take care of yourself, okay??

Hi Samantha.  I'll be keeping you and your friends in my thoughts today.  It sure is hard to wait for news.  I do agree with Sighsnootles about taking good care of yourself too. 

Hope you are able to get in touch with your friends soon. 

TL

Aw Samantha.....

I'm sorry you're having such a rough time. Yes! Yes! I'll pray for Jenny and Paula and that someone will contact you real soon.

God bless and take care.

(((((((((((((((((((((((Samantha)))))))))))))))))))))

You need a big hug!

Yes, I know what you mean. I'm living in a highrise since 1973. During all these years I've seen so many people get sick and die , including family and friends living elsewhere.

They tell us its all for a purpose meaning we can learn compassion, patience, love , kindness etc. and virtues we wouldn't learn otherwise. Then of course they say the dead have gone to a better place.

Still, I must say I don't see anything very pretty about suffering and death. I think its just hellish. I don't think anyone is singled out by God to suffer or to die. You aren't being punished. That's just silly. Its just that so much bad stuff is happening in your life all at once. I feel the same sometimes: "Will I too be dead tomorrow?".

Its only when it affects us or hits home so to speak that we become aware and we feel all kinds of emotions like sadness, anxiety, fear etc. We ask God why but its a useless question.

All I know for sure is that our bodies are physical. Our body parts get diseases or wear out and  we die. Someone once said that if God made the world he made the germs that kill us too. Yikes! I don't know about that; a creepy thought. We know that we humans have  sure helped  wreck the environment and many of our foods contain poison preservatives etc. (BHT- rat poison in cereal) so I don't think we can blame God. Or we  ourselves are God's hands on this earth since we have freedom to make choices and we make the wrong choices. Also each person walks their own journey and we can't control other people's lives.

Hang in there and you'll get through. You are as strong as the rest of us. Despite miracles which I do believe in you and I are pretty weak. We can't affect very much except as we pray we do get strength and renewed hope for others as well as for ourselves.

Remember: This too will pass. Everything, all our troubles are only for a little while. Its always darkest just before the dawn. My prayers are with you and your friends.

I don't mean to be callous but here's a quote:

Dear Samantha

        You aren't being punished. Tested, maybe, but not punished, that's not how GOD works. I will keep praying of course. I can sense how much you're hurting and I hope you find multiple ways to address that. I think in addition to wondercafe a physical church could be good for you. Big churches often have smaller groups, Sunday School classes and other groups that are far more personable than just the big Sunday service with hundreds of people. If not that one I'm sure there are others around. One thing we have in America is many churches. Look in the phone book or get online and check variations of "yourtown.org" or .com, or .gov and see what they have listed. Chances are your local newspaper would have some good info too. Unless you live so far out they have to pipe in sunlight I'd just about guarantee you there's several churches within a few miles. Please don't ever forget that you're GOD's child and he loves you. As a father myself I've got an inkling how big a deal that is. There's nothing more precious to me than my baby and although I can't actually imagine it GOD's love is bigger than that even.

Hi Samantha

your quote:They said they'd write me about it but i haven't heard from them or any of their friends who'd drop by since.

If I remember correctly  I think Jenny had terminal cancer? Do you think she may have passed away?  If so and including the whole illness it may be something that's just too painful for Paula  to write about or discuss. Sometimes people get tired  talking over and over again about it as it seems to reinforce the illness or painful memories if its death.

Personally I'm a bit of a believer in reincarnation because it explains why people die young; the death of a child for example. The belief is that we choose our own birth and our own death albeit subconsciously. So...a child comes to earth or reincarnates  to fulfill a certain mission  (karma maybe) and has only planned to stay a short time. Some people think that the starving people in Africa are wise old souls who have chosen their destiny in order to learn or to teach.

The idea is that our purpose on earth is to learn how to love. We're kind of slow so it might take 1000's of years.....lol. It is said that no one should interfere too much in another's life ( meaning this or that should happen) since we don't have all knowledge of the person's life journey and the lessons needful for the person to learn.

I'm not saying its true but I entertain a mixture of beliefs without putting anyone's beliefs down or saying such-and-such is wrong. God is huge! What do I know? I'm free to believe in "something of everything". Some ideas about God are in the bible and other ideas are found in other holy writings. Its all O.K. by me.

When we think about God we have to think about what I call inter-connectedness to everybody and everything or to interdependency. Every action or even every thought affects other people. When we talk about miracles its not just about God and I and what I want.

God is like some monster spider's web or perhaps God's the internet....laugh....you know what I mean. Imagine a few people living together in one house and how their actions and words affect each other. The earth is like that and nobody knows  for 100% sure how God fits into it. Some believe God is mainly within people. The people make choices re free will so they in effect become God and determine how the world goes re wars etc. in particular.

Uh..oh...sorry I'm on a rant! I don't have a PHD in giving lectures. Sometimes its better to keep quiet rather than opening one's mouth to reveal being a fool. Oh well...

Much love and I'll keep praying  ((((((Samantha))))))))))

 P.S.

There's 411.ca re finding people but I think you need some idea because so many people will show up on it under the same name. It also prob. isn't up to date if people have moved.

I don't know if you have the Salvation Army where you live or where Jenny and Paula live?  I know in Canada they are very good at finding missing persons. They will put a big effort into it .

I put 411.com usa into google:

http://www.411.com/

ummm, samantha.

just saying...they may feel that you are stalking them and intentionally telling friends to not give out information.

i recognize that it can feel awful...and you would wish honesty; however, consider that option, and if it is possible, then what would it take for you to accept it.

Understood, but, cyber-stalking does exist.

Sometimes, and I am not saying that this item is occuring here; however, consider it a possibility.....people do not wish to be chatted to any more.

When they do, it is relatively easy to make up a tale, to say, heh, i am going away...and then quit responding to mail and to advise friends not to tell someoen where they are.

Samantha : See my post above.

Here's a poem for you. 

• Ubuntu – I am Because You Are!!!

  Beautiful artwork courtesy of SanityFound

  ~~~~

  I have been blessed through out the years

  by kin and strangers alike who have caught my tears

  Who have gave me strength; eased my fears. . .

  Into their basin of unconditional love supreme . . .

  and turned those tears so magically

  into a blessing; making sad eyes gleam

  who have turned nightmares into dreams . . .

   

  All webs in life are weaved together

  we all are one; from begining until forever

  though we may be close or lightyears apart

  our actions send endless waves rippling to all hearts

  So often we may not realize

  What we do and say travel endless miles

  When we feed the hungry; or simply give a smile . .

   

  However we relate to our fellow man

  is chain reacted across the land and back again

  Thus far I've been blessed beyond compare

  From the whole of humanity, timeless; everywhere

  And so I feel compelled to pass on a blessing

  to aide humanity in not regressing

  into the darkness of separation and instinct

  because were're all connected by a common link

  So though you may be close or very far,

  your light warms humanity like a distant star

  Without you there would be no me

  Thus, I'm grateful for your being, eternally

  For the love you share, I say UBUNTU

  I am what I am because of all of you!

  Sun brings forth life as a distant star

  As such, I AM BECAUSE YOU ARE!

  ~Written especially for YOU - By CordieB.

   

  The meaning of Ubantu:

   

 Archbishop Desmond Tutu, in my books, gave the best description by far with his words:

“It is the essence of being human. It speaks of the fact that my humanity is caught up and is inextricably bound up in yours. I am human because I belong. It speaks about wholeness, it speaks about compassion. A person with Ubuntu is welcoming, hospitable, warm and generous, willing to share. Such people are open and available to others, willing to be vulnerable, affirming of others, do not feel threatened that others are able and good, for they have a proper self-assurance that comes from knowing that they belong in a greater whole. They know that they are diminished when others are humiliated, diminished when others are oppressed, diminished when others are treated as if they were less than who they are. The quality of Ubuntu gives people resilience, enabling them to survive and emerge still human despite all efforts to dehumanise them.”

Hi Stardust,

That is a great quote about Ubuntu from Archibishop Desmond Tutu. Where did you find it? Is it from a book?

Samantha, you seem to imply in recent posts that Jenny had some kind of illness and that you are concerned about her dying. Am I reading that right?

I am concerned about the amount of time you have been worried about this without answers. I hope you have other friends you can talk to about how this is affecting you.

Kappa

Ubuntu came through a link. I had never heard of it before. It is nice isn't it...... in the heart of Africa. Its surely a place where the people need to help each other. If only we could put it into practice seeing everyone from the least to the highest as having worth and value. By the way, this includes the rich as well. God loves the rich as well as the poor.

Notice the website  title...."sanity found".....we can all use some!

http://sanityfound.wordpress.com/2008/06/29/ubuntu-in-a-can/

Samantha has family and people to talk to. It so happens that sometimes people are able to express their thoughts better in writing, hence the net can be a useful outlet or therapy.

Samantha

There's nothing wrong with praying for others except I'm afraid you'll exhaust yourself. You had better try to take care of Samantha too!   Worrying can be very stressful, so stressful that we can fall down physically ourselves. I don't know if you are working or not? I mean are you with people in the daytime? 

I've been on a number of (bus ) country  day trips with a Senior's Center this summer.We all have problems. Its just so good to get away and forget about  them! I went on a boat cruise twice. It was just divine.....

I wish you could have some good times too; that's all.

May You Be Blessed - short movie

http://www.mayyoubeblessedmovie.com.

P.S. My husband passed away 5 months ago. We were married 46 years. Its tough. Before he died he said : " My life is over but you still have yours". I remember these words and I want to live, to be, to move on the best I can.

Love and God Bless XXXXXXXXXX000000000

Samantha

Wow! You're a writer. That's wonderful. I didn't realize it. I suppose its too difficult to get anything published? The average writer in Canada or the USA doesn't stand a chance. Its not fair. Famous people, movie stars etc.  can get  anything published and we can't.

I don't know what has happened to community or  neighborhood but many of the people living in my highrise  apt. building are also alone. Nobody even knows their neighbors or cares to know them. The only way to meet people seems to  be to join some organization or group...but what? Being socially involved with people also requires lots of bucks and lots of people are just getting by; no money for pleasure purposes.

I know some people in my building but we don't visit. I'm lucky I have my daughter and grandson living with me. I've met a lot of really nice folks the past few months but I don't form friendships easily. People wear masks and when we really get to know them sometimes we're not that keen about them.....lol. Been there, done that! It takes a lot of time and good luck to meet those we may really like. I often  sort of laugh because we go around saying we love everyone. Yet, in reality its simply not true. We may love them meaning we wouldn't wish anyone harm but not enough to invite them in for a tea or coffee...lol. I have two good old friends who don't live here.

Did you know Jenny and these friends in person or was it via emails on the internet?  Maybe if it was by emails they don't have computers?  It can be hard to find internet cafes  and they are expensive here , or libraries with computers sometimes. Or...was it snail mail....

Thanks to Jon and yourself re my husband. Sorry I can't say if God has a plan for our lives or not. Its a mystery. There's  an awful lot of   good people who have pretty hellish lives. God gave us freewill and brains. Sometimes we ourselves  make the wrong choices in life. I  think God works in partnership with us but doesn't over rule our bad choices! Mind is the builder. Whatever we feed grows. We need to be careful of our own thoughts. In some ways we are building our future with them. There's an old saying : "Be careful of what you wish for. You just may get it". This means we have to try and look on the bright side despite everything that's going wrong.

See next post re some thoughts someone wrote on the net.