Granted, but the second language will be Klingon.

I wish I could lose 50 lbs.

Granted - but you won't be able to have any hot chocolate when you come back inside.

I wish I could waterski.

Granted but only romances

I wish for a dog as a pet

But you only sing Wagner.

I wish I could fly.

Granted, but you'll be 10 years younger in dog years.

I wish I was rich.

Granted. But you will never know how many people find your invention useful.

I wish I could start a really interesting discussion thread here on wondercafe.

Granted:  William Shatner appears at your door, naked and shamefaced:

"I'm.  Sorry.  I.  Boldy.  Went.  Where.  I.  Should.  Not.  Have.  Gone.  Before.  I.  Was.  Out.  Of.  Girdles.  And.  I.  Made.  A.  Wish.

He hands your binder back with a lifetime membership to his Newsletter.

I wish that I could discover how the Canadian government manages to exist with such a small population base.

Granted, but it's replaced by the naked image of Richard Simmons.

I wish I could have a passionate love affair with Pierce Brosnan, preferably as he was when he was around 40.

Granted, but you will have to tow the snow-blower back to the shop yourself, on foot, wearing snow shoes.

I wish I had easier to manage hair.

Granted:  Your hair is easier to manage because you're bald. 

I wish I hadn't totally overindulged at dinner tonight, which has lead to a sore tummy and the inability to do up my pants.  *sigh*

Reading through this thread I am reminded once again that life is full of 'trade-offs'.  For every decision we make there is a disadvantage.  We have to decide if it is worthwhile.

Tabitha wishes she had an IPAD.

I'll grant her wish, but she is going to find it consumes a great deal of her time and she may end up missing opportunities to relate to family and friends in real life as she uses her IPOD.

I wish I could age gracefully without the my body parts wearing out - aching, paining, failing or just worrying me - and I wish the same for my friends.

Granted, but you're gonna have to wait for it... :)

I wish I could write the next Great Canadian Novel.

Granted, but your grokking will be balked at...groking and balking, groking and balking...not much different from now. For, the more you grok, the less you know.

I wish politicians would say what they mean and mean what they say.

Granted, but she's going to fart all night, and it will be loud and smelly!

This one is from my daughter.  She wishes for a witch costume with a new broom to go with it.

Granted, but they will be pot cookies and you'll be busted for having them!

I wish I could be a man instead of a woman for 3 days.

Mists:  Grante, but for those 3 days the remote will be lost under the couch.

Kimmio:  Granted, but your TV will be a black-and-white set, circa 1960 vintage.

I wish I had a horse.

I like the 1960's TV actually. Thanks!

Granted, but the maid makes more of a mess than was there in the first place.

I wish I had a washer and dryer in my apartment (we have to go downstairs).

Granted, but just when this perfect weather is about to start, you'll find out that you have to move to Antarctica permanently.

I wish my students would behave themselves.

Granted, your boxes are unpacked, but everything is just laying around on the floor in no particular order and some of it is broken.

I wish someone would buy me a dozen eggs.  FRESH eggs.  From a CHICKEN.  With no baby chickens in them.  Unbroken.  ;)

Granted:  you become a kind of living quantum black hole -- everything you observe gets sucked into you.  Eventually, like all black holes, you evapourate (after a LONG TIME), gradually losing weight to energy, ending with a very big bang.

I wish I didn't understand this movie

Granted - but insted of right now you have to wait until the novel I'm writing gets published and picked up for a movie - you might have to wait a long time.

I wish a published would just jump out and tell me that they've heard I'm writing a novel and show an interest in it.